I am having a great time this week! I'm hanging out with my old business partners running a leadership institute in Indianapolis and I feel fully and completely myself. I'm grounded, in my zone and fully present to the moment at hand. What a gift!
This is the second year I have worked the Institue and I am always awed by the magic created with/by this work. The Institute is for women who have been identified as leaders in a primarily male work environment. These ladies are confident, intelligent and capable. They have the stuff many mothers want for their adult daughters - the ability and skills to lead the full and accomplished life of their choosing.
The ladies represent a spectrum of backgrounds: marital status, age, socio-economic background, sexual orientation, educational institutions - you name it and it's probably represented. They delight my heart and Spirit because I see such beauty and power in them. It is a joy to have those two particular characteristics in combination around me.
They are also good for my sense of self. In the past two days I have been honored for my ability to listen and coach, as an author and as a facilitator. It is so nice to live this part of myself, it's like a vacation!
Gotta run as we are meeting and I'm late. The guys above are Naturally 7 - if you have never heard them, click the arrow and enjoy!
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Saturday, June 16, 2007
Summer Starts
Thanks to all who expressed concern re: my blogger friend. I think he is moving forward, but so little is sure. Anyway, he knows he always has a shoulder here.
Life seems to be puttering along. Work is very busy and I am career planning. Lately, it seems that I am being given more exposure and am rising to the occasion. Teammates seek my advice and thank me after they take it. The boss displays new levels of confidence in my abilities. Which, has its good and bad side.
Those of you who have been a friend for a while may understand my mixed feelings when I tell you this next bit of news. It has been announced that the manager who tormented me and enjoyed it has been given her walking papers - rather cruelly, too.
She was not only told she didn't have a job, but was made to host the 8th Annual Big Deal Gathering of Leaders. So, there she was with a smile frozen on her face, shaking hands and trying to be witty when on the microphone. Everyone knew she was out and I heard a few comments that were less than kind.
Now, don't get me wrong, she deserved her exit papers. But, it was still sad to watch another human be brought so low. And, so you know the whole truth, you can also find me with a smile on the edges of my lips when I think about it. There is a sweet satisfaction in witnessing the go around, come around.
With that, summer is progressing nicely. The girl child is playing tennis and then will enjoy soccer and debate camps before the end of the season. Somedays I wish I was in camp. Doesn't that sound nice?
Be well, relax and have a little summer fun for me...
Life seems to be puttering along. Work is very busy and I am career planning. Lately, it seems that I am being given more exposure and am rising to the occasion. Teammates seek my advice and thank me after they take it. The boss displays new levels of confidence in my abilities. Which, has its good and bad side.
Those of you who have been a friend for a while may understand my mixed feelings when I tell you this next bit of news. It has been announced that the manager who tormented me and enjoyed it has been given her walking papers - rather cruelly, too.
She was not only told she didn't have a job, but was made to host the 8th Annual Big Deal Gathering of Leaders. So, there she was with a smile frozen on her face, shaking hands and trying to be witty when on the microphone. Everyone knew she was out and I heard a few comments that were less than kind.
Now, don't get me wrong, she deserved her exit papers. But, it was still sad to watch another human be brought so low. And, so you know the whole truth, you can also find me with a smile on the edges of my lips when I think about it. There is a sweet satisfaction in witnessing the go around, come around.
With that, summer is progressing nicely. The girl child is playing tennis and then will enjoy soccer and debate camps before the end of the season. Somedays I wish I was in camp. Doesn't that sound nice?
Be well, relax and have a little summer fun for me...
Thursday, June 07, 2007
The thing I love about blogging is the way you can connect to people who you may never meet in the flesh, never hold them through their tears or know the sound of their laughter. And yet, you do and know all those things and more; there are so many intimacies that we share with one another until we feel like friends.
When a friend goes off for awhile we are usually happy for them and look forward to hearing their adventure when we visit their space. Maybe it will take a month or two, but we continue to check back (like so many of you have here) and then smile deeply when they drop by or leave a new picture or share some good (or bad) bit in which they are immersed.
So far, I've had the experience of being afraid for two of my blogger friends (at different times); afraid that they are on thinning ice and the heat is turned up. I'm in that state today because a friend's blog reads of chemicals and disappearing and tiredness. When I visit my friend's blog I can feel how tired he is. You know that space that is beyond exhaustion, where everything seems futile? Maybe you don't know, maybe you are lucky, but he's there and I made an unplanned trip to that space once.
There is nothing I can do to support my friend's safety. I have no phone number, no address, no way to drive by and check on him. I'm not even sure where he lives outside of cyberspace.
If he should, by chance, stop by and read this I want him to know that I am thinking of him and sending Love straight to his heart, that it's ok if everything falls apart, sometimes that's what a Life needs. I want this sweet man to know that there is Life on the other side of complete and utter emptiness, on the flip side of loneliness. On this rapidly spinning ball of dirt, we come to know that it's that very dirt that makes up the fertile ground of Life.
Stand up! I want to shout it at him. I want to wake him up and force him to choose Joy. But it doesn't work that way and I know it. So, I just want him to know that I care for him and have him in my thoughts. I am sending all the energy I can to him so he can find his footing on a good path.
When a friend goes off for awhile we are usually happy for them and look forward to hearing their adventure when we visit their space. Maybe it will take a month or two, but we continue to check back (like so many of you have here) and then smile deeply when they drop by or leave a new picture or share some good (or bad) bit in which they are immersed.
So far, I've had the experience of being afraid for two of my blogger friends (at different times); afraid that they are on thinning ice and the heat is turned up. I'm in that state today because a friend's blog reads of chemicals and disappearing and tiredness. When I visit my friend's blog I can feel how tired he is. You know that space that is beyond exhaustion, where everything seems futile? Maybe you don't know, maybe you are lucky, but he's there and I made an unplanned trip to that space once.
There is nothing I can do to support my friend's safety. I have no phone number, no address, no way to drive by and check on him. I'm not even sure where he lives outside of cyberspace.
If he should, by chance, stop by and read this I want him to know that I am thinking of him and sending Love straight to his heart, that it's ok if everything falls apart, sometimes that's what a Life needs. I want this sweet man to know that there is Life on the other side of complete and utter emptiness, on the flip side of loneliness. On this rapidly spinning ball of dirt, we come to know that it's that very dirt that makes up the fertile ground of Life.
Stand up! I want to shout it at him. I want to wake him up and force him to choose Joy. But it doesn't work that way and I know it. So, I just want him to know that I care for him and have him in my thoughts. I am sending all the energy I can to him so he can find his footing on a good path.
r ddeisyf chan 'm asgre atat 'm anwylyd
The wish of my heart to you 'm anwylyd'
The wish of my heart to you 'm anwylyd'
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Life Keeps Moving
I realize my complaining sounded far too serious, when I really meant it to be more comical. When I wrote my last entry I was rushing and just wanted to say hey. I had NO idea it would take so long to get back here.
But, here I am. Stuff, as always, is happening. Here are some highlights:
The girl child is 13 in a couple of days. I have a hosts of surprises in store for her and keeping the secrets are just about making me burst! Gift cards to her favorite stores, Beyonce concert tickets and a few other trinkets. Then there's the big party, which we're planning together. Fun, fun, fun!
School is just about out and, once again, I'm a very proud Mom. All the fuss and expense for her birthday is her bonus for doing an incredible job. She worked so hard; this school year was filled with sweat and tears and she proved she was up to the task of excelling in 7th grade. She would have done well without trying so hard, but she was intent on doing her best. I hope she carries that with her forever.
My home has been descended upon by family. Good people (my 1st cousin's daughter and her family), but there are more of them than there are of us and quarters are feeling cramped and I am getting grumpy. They operate out of a different sense of rules around childrearing and housekeeping. So, we have regular long talks (where I do most of the talking) and work at co-existing in a space that is not large enough. It's also odd because we have not had a man living in our space for such an extended period of time. The whole appropriate clothing thing is getting old.
As I understand it, they have found a place and, after 8 weeks will be moving on. I think that will be good for everyone. Then they can drop by for dinner and we can stop by their place to see the kids and the tension of trying to create a home, with family that you do not really know, will be lifted.
Work is in its busiest period. In some ways that's good. I always get to learn more during these times because everyone needs to work with the person who can get the job done. And, that would be me.
I've started studying for the GREs and will likely take a course early this fall.
As for all of you, I have missed you a lot. I'll take some time this week to cruise by and smile at you. Love you!
But, here I am. Stuff, as always, is happening. Here are some highlights:
The girl child is 13 in a couple of days. I have a hosts of surprises in store for her and keeping the secrets are just about making me burst! Gift cards to her favorite stores, Beyonce concert tickets and a few other trinkets. Then there's the big party, which we're planning together. Fun, fun, fun!
School is just about out and, once again, I'm a very proud Mom. All the fuss and expense for her birthday is her bonus for doing an incredible job. She worked so hard; this school year was filled with sweat and tears and she proved she was up to the task of excelling in 7th grade. She would have done well without trying so hard, but she was intent on doing her best. I hope she carries that with her forever.
My home has been descended upon by family. Good people (my 1st cousin's daughter and her family), but there are more of them than there are of us and quarters are feeling cramped and I am getting grumpy. They operate out of a different sense of rules around childrearing and housekeeping. So, we have regular long talks (where I do most of the talking) and work at co-existing in a space that is not large enough. It's also odd because we have not had a man living in our space for such an extended period of time. The whole appropriate clothing thing is getting old.
As I understand it, they have found a place and, after 8 weeks will be moving on. I think that will be good for everyone. Then they can drop by for dinner and we can stop by their place to see the kids and the tension of trying to create a home, with family that you do not really know, will be lifted.
Work is in its busiest period. In some ways that's good. I always get to learn more during these times because everyone needs to work with the person who can get the job done. And, that would be me.
I've started studying for the GREs and will likely take a course early this fall.
As for all of you, I have missed you a lot. I'll take some time this week to cruise by and smile at you. Love you!
Sunday, April 22, 2007
URRRGH!!!!!
My love affair with blogger has now ended.
I tried to post and got kicked out, just as I was publishing. Turns out all these blog hosts are the same - making promises they can't keep, lulling you into a false sense of security, luring you in with lots of pretty bells and whistles and then - BAM! Lost words, ideas and a bit of your story, all gone.
I feel so used...
I'm volunteering just about every waking hour this weekend, but I'll try to recreate the thought and feeling later this week.
Love and Peace to you all...
Gayle
I tried to post and got kicked out, just as I was publishing. Turns out all these blog hosts are the same - making promises they can't keep, lulling you into a false sense of security, luring you in with lots of pretty bells and whistles and then - BAM! Lost words, ideas and a bit of your story, all gone.
I feel so used...
I'm volunteering just about every waking hour this weekend, but I'll try to recreate the thought and feeling later this week.
Love and Peace to you all...
Gayle
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
Choosing Joy
It's official; after much thought, prayer and opening of my heart, it's decided. we (Mom, my baby girl and I) will all stay put. For the past few years I have felt imprisoned. Stuck and held back by circumstance and those I Love.
For a brief moment it seemed as if I had figured it all out. Back to school, moving, complete new lifestyle and all would be well. But, as I have always known, the truest changes happen from the inside out.
The first half of my adulthood found me moving every 3-4 years. I enjoyed a change of venue, it gave me a sense of adventure and progress. It helped to be single with my whole life seemingly ahead of me. And I've been wanting to recapture that sense of myself; to feel as if the possibilities are endless.
What I have discovered, is that there are endless possibilities and some of them are not as good as others. After years of making every decision in the best interest of my child, I wanted to get back to thinking more and more of myself; to be free of the constraints of making Life good for others. Now, that idea seems steeped in a very narrow vision of possibilities.
If you have been reading with some consistency, you may remember that I have been practicing focusing my attention on the now. It is that focus that has changed me. Much of my desire to change everything came from my discomfort with what is - my current Life. Confronting that notion, by considering the damage that might be done to Mom by my picking up and changing everything, has made me realize that everything can be changed from anywhere.
What needs changing in my Life are things that a new home or city cannot make happen, though it . They are the slow, process changes that require commitment. I have often had trouble keeping the commitments I make to myself. But, in the end, that is all that is required - to do those things that I know will change my Life in good ways.
Like walking up a steep and endless hill, progress seems inconsequential. But turning to look behind me, I can see the ground I have covered and it renews me. Stopping to feel the sun on my face, the soft breeze and the beauty that surrounds me daily, renews me further. I am exercising, making home improvements, paying off debt and improving my financial condition, flirting for fun, volunteering and smiling, now, in this present moment because my Life is good. Loving and caring for others eliminates some possibilities and creates others.
So, I won't reach after the sexy loft condo or send my Mom off to live in another state. I'm here and I choose to feel Joy - to Live out the possibility of happiness regardless of the external circumstances. It feels really good, surprisingly so.
May all your days be filled with joy.
For a brief moment it seemed as if I had figured it all out. Back to school, moving, complete new lifestyle and all would be well. But, as I have always known, the truest changes happen from the inside out.
The first half of my adulthood found me moving every 3-4 years. I enjoyed a change of venue, it gave me a sense of adventure and progress. It helped to be single with my whole life seemingly ahead of me. And I've been wanting to recapture that sense of myself; to feel as if the possibilities are endless.
What I have discovered, is that there are endless possibilities and some of them are not as good as others. After years of making every decision in the best interest of my child, I wanted to get back to thinking more and more of myself; to be free of the constraints of making Life good for others. Now, that idea seems steeped in a very narrow vision of possibilities.
If you have been reading with some consistency, you may remember that I have been practicing focusing my attention on the now. It is that focus that has changed me. Much of my desire to change everything came from my discomfort with what is - my current Life. Confronting that notion, by considering the damage that might be done to Mom by my picking up and changing everything, has made me realize that everything can be changed from anywhere.
What needs changing in my Life are things that a new home or city cannot make happen, though it . They are the slow, process changes that require commitment. I have often had trouble keeping the commitments I make to myself. But, in the end, that is all that is required - to do those things that I know will change my Life in good ways.
Like walking up a steep and endless hill, progress seems inconsequential. But turning to look behind me, I can see the ground I have covered and it renews me. Stopping to feel the sun on my face, the soft breeze and the beauty that surrounds me daily, renews me further. I am exercising, making home improvements, paying off debt and improving my financial condition, flirting for fun, volunteering and smiling, now, in this present moment because my Life is good. Loving and caring for others eliminates some possibilities and creates others.
So, I won't reach after the sexy loft condo or send my Mom off to live in another state. I'm here and I choose to feel Joy - to Live out the possibility of happiness regardless of the external circumstances. It feels really good, surprisingly so.
May all your days be filled with joy.
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